couples service announcement

In the interest of safety, alterity, and time management The Federal Administration of Cognomens (TFAC) in association with The South Side Administrative Council (TSSAC) advises the following couples refer to each other herein as:

Maria & Soupy = Marioupy*
Jen & Bunny = Jeunny
Jason & Kate = Jate
Dave & Amy = Damy
Theresa & Damien = Theramien
Scott & Bridget = Scidget
Derek & Becky = Decky
Shawn & Rachel = Shachel

Please note proper usage of the shiny new pseudonyms:

eg. "Hey, honey, why don't you call up Theramien and see what they're up to?"
eg. "I just bumped into Damy. They're up at Mangia. Wanna go?"

Participation is voluntary though slightly recommended, as are additions to this list.

Thank you,
Management.

* As of January 9, 2008 Marioupy shall be changed to Marsoupial per legislative order. Management reserved the right to a hissy fit before said changes occurred.